LaRae Quy was an undercover and counterintelligence FBI agent for 24 years. She exposed foreign spies and recruited them to work for the U.S. Government. As an FBI agent, she developed the mental toughness to survive in environments of risk, uncertainty, and deception. Faced with stressful and fast-moving situations, she needed to move through barriers if she was to succeed.
Are You Mentally Tough?
Mental toughness is believing you will prevail in your circumstances rather than believing your circumstances will change. It’s managing your emotions, thoughts, and behavior in ways that set you up for success in both business and life. Get your Mental Toughness Score – see where you excel and what areas need attention.
Secrets of a Strong Mind: How to Build Inner Strength to Overcome Life's Obstacles
A former FBI counter-espionage agent offers field-tested methods for readers to develop mental toughness. She provides a curated package of tools and techniques to help them realize they are capable of far more than they believe to be possible.
Mental Toughness for Women Leaders: 52 Tips To Recognize and Utilize Your Greatest Strengths
Tranquility is the mother lode of mental toughness. By tranquility, I don’t mean a boatload of prescription medicine that will turn you into a zombie. The Stoics meant tranquility as the wisdom to differentiate between what we can control from what we cannot. With that wisdom comes the understanding that if we’re smart, we will expend our energy on those things we can control.
Why You Need Mental Toughness
Grit Under Pressure
Grit is an intrinsic desire to go beyond what you can easily accomplish with talent or skill.
Grit Under Pressure
- A deep sense of purpose because you believe your work is worth it.
- Purpose boils down to understanding how you can give your talents and skills back to the world.
- Motivation to go beyond what you can easily achieve with talent.
- Success is often where people stop on their way to being who they truly want to be.
- Conditions don’t have to be perfect to start if you pursue something that answers your “why” and is important to you.
- Great lives respond to a higher calling and purpose.
- Purpose is the linchpin of grit.
The Right Mindset
Mental toughness is not something you’re born with, it’s a mindset you can develop.
The Right Mindset
- Attitude is the difference between a mentally tough champion and a whiny wimp.
- Negative emotions make us uncomfortable but without discomfort, there is no change and no growth.
- It’s not a lack of fear that creates a strong mind; it’s how we deal with negative fear-based emotions.
- The greatest mental toughness weapon we have is our ability to choose one thought over another.
- Mental toughness requires positive thinking. Positive people know they will prevail in their circumstances rather than hope their circumstances will change.
When Life Sucks
Mental toughness gives you the ability to be comfortable with discomfort while producing inner confidence.
When Life Sucks
- Stability is a shut-off valve for the brain. You only learn when there’s uncertainty.
- Petri dishes full of new experiences will help you anticipate what it feels like to fail so you can respond and not react when the stakes are higher.
- Left in darkness, fear will grow and sabotage your efforts to move forward.
- The only difference between a rut and a coffin is their dimensions.
- Wisdom is understanding that we’re not sure we have all the right answers.
- Success won’t make you confident; confidence will make you successful.
- Shit Happens. Life is hard. Pain is inevitable. Growth is optional.
LaRae’s Recent Posts
Resilience comes from believing in yourself, and more importantly, in something bigger than yourself.
Life is always a crapshoot; sometimes we get lucky and sometimes we don’t. But we will always be at the whim of our fortunes if we don’t have the mental toughness to choose our response.
It’s hard to make sense of the world right now; we’re in the middle of a pandemic, racial strife, and a political divide in America that looks more like Dante’s version of hell every day. We’re bombarded with social media, camera phones, and a 24/7 news cycle....
It’s no secret that we’re faced with a growing mental health crisis right now and many of us are experiencing incredible amounts of pain and suffering. A Kaiser Family Foundation poll reported that nearly half of Americans report the coronavirus crisis is harming...
As a female FBI agent, there weren’t always a lot of women in my office—or in the building, for that matter. The closest thing to a mentor I had was my male training agent, who viewed me as more of a burden than an opportunity. But it had been to my advantage to be...
FBI agents who investigate knotty and complex cases—such as terrorism, cybercrime, and counterintelligence—need to develop a strong mind if they want to be successful.
People are social animals—we’ve evolved to live in tribes and rely upon one another, both physically and emotionally as well
Habits account for around 40 percent of our behaviors so it’s important to understand how to build good ones and recognize the bad ones.
It’s an inconvenient truth but being likable can make life easier, no matter your job or lifestyle.
When I was ten years old, I was riding my black quarter horse and helping my dad cut a horned bull from the cattle herd. The bull suddenly turned, horns first, and charged my horse. I grabbed the saddle horn; my horse pivoted on his back hooves and we got away...
Are YOU Mentally Tough?
See how YOU Score
Mental toughness is believing you will prevail in your circumstances rather than believing your circumstances will change. Find your Mental Toughness score - see where you excel and what areas need attention.